Long Wait Time

There has been a major wait time between posts on this blog. I am sorry for that, but if you have been reading what I have been writing, you will know that my life has been somewhat up in the air for quite some time. I am trying to get back on track and do a blog post a week or so and give you some idea of what I have been up to for the past while.

On a bittersweet note, I will be getting officially divorced by sometime in October. The court system here tends to run slowly in the summer. On the one hand, I loved my woman and feel that I deserved better than she gave me. On the other hand, things were spiralling out of control and something needed to change. I do not think that a divorce was necessary, but I will be damned if I will hang around somewhere I am not wanted. I can only hope that there is someone out there waiting to meet me that will offer me the love and attention I deserve.

On a more fun note, I went to GenCon last weekend. It was a blast. There were folk groups in costume, acres of boobs on display and all kinds of games. Board games, live action games, miniature games... It was unreal. To think that there were 40,000 people like me in one place for four days. The mind boggles at the concept.

On a bitchy note, there seems to be little work in my field right now and I may have to leave the support network I have created here in order to get gainful employment. That sucks, because I have been trying to create this network for quite some time. And I have put myself on the line in the attempt to find people who will help me be myself. It is not easy for me to be myself, as I feel that I am much to low to be wanted. And so I fake it. I create a fake self in order to interact with others in what I imagine is a reasonable fashion. Fortunately, I have found a group of people that I feel comfortable being myself around. It has been a great relief to know that I can interact with people without needing to fake myself, but I need to translate that good work that I have done for myself to the real world. Part of me thinks that I should get a nice, simple retail job. There would be a paycheque and something to do every day, but I know that I bore easily. I do not know if that is the right place for me.

So, my life is on an upswing now, even though I am living with my parents, living with a mental illness and struggling with my ADHD. I am attempting to rock.

Later,

Goonius Maximus