Feeling Good

Today I woke up happy. I did not feel numb, not broken, lost or out of place. I did not even feel content. I was happy. For the mentally ill in the western world, Christmas is a loaded time. In addition to what ever difficulties one is already facing, the Christmas need for good cheer can be overwhelming. now that Christmas is done and over with, I can feel myself easing up on myself and the restrictions I place on myself.

The week prior to Christmas, my lady and I went and exchanged gifts with out friends. That was a very good thing, but seeing so many people in such a short period of time was difficult. I was so tired of painting masks over myself that I did not get to spend the time with my sister-in-law and her husband that I wanted to. And I hid out at home playing Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood with my doggies.

I am sad that I missed out on that opportunity, but I needed to chill out on my own. Sorting out my place in the world, redefining myself, all that bullshit that keeps me hiding in my home away from the world. My place is fluid in the world and I am trying to realign my thinking to that end.

Sorry for the rambling post, but I hope you will understand that I needed this on "paper" to remember that I had a Happy Day.

Thanks for listening,

Goonius Maximus